Vidai..

Those days I never understood what it was all about.. shaadi ke baad vidai, rona dhona melodrama.. May be all those were nonsense to me.. All that mattered to me was that when you are getting married, when you are entering a phase of happiness, why all this drama for.. All that mattered to me was the love that existed between a couple, the urge to be together, the day both of them wait for..

Today I have different meanings to it.. When am almost there for marriage.. When my name is climbing up the waiting list.. Realisations have struck me.. My perspectives have changed.. I can say it has totally changed in the last 3 months.. May be I needed nothing more than the engagement.. My love has been approved, by parents, by public.. That’s all I wanted.. cos, me and he remain the same, before, now and even afterwards..

Marriage is gonna make a lot of difference, not to the relation between us.. But my relation with others.. I wish I can stop the world from revolving right now, I wish I have a time machine with me.. I wish I can lock and unlock it whenever I want.. I wish these days never end.. These days of togetherness, friends.. and… family too.. And some relations which make no sense to others..

                   

The promises that nothing will change echoes in my ears and mind, but have to accept, it will change.. the bubbliness in me might fade, the responsibilities and roles of a wife, daughter-in-law will take its place.. I wont be a child in that house.. nobody will pet me in that house.. I wont have a brother there to pamper me.. I wont have a mom to listen to my innocent sweet talks.. I wont be a child there, I will have to become a lady.. On whom they all have expectations, which am bound to fulfil. Only thing which will be familiar there will be his love for me.. Which yeah, would be enough to forget the rest of the world.. But will it be possible for me?

That day my brother had told- you are too small for marriage, are you actually ready for it? This question didn’t sound complicated then, but why is it feeling now... why do I feel like being a baby now? Why do I feel like getting all the love and concern? Do all girls experience this, or am I thinking weird? Why do I have a feeling even am gonna cry that day, after my marriage, for my vidai...